2. Getting the hedge to grow (Yea, right - my garden seems to
     have an aversion to hedges...)

3. Getting a six pack stomach (then again - why get a six
     pack when you can get a keg?)

4. Children. [Mission accomplished - August 14, 2000 -  Welcome, little
      one] - Working on # 2 - Very tough  cookie, though... Well,
     maybe she'll give in someday

5. Having a happy & healthy family

6. A 32 wide screen TV to go with my home entertainment
     system 

7. Increasing my salary [achieved]

8. Decreasing my cost of living [a hard one...]

9. Dodging the taxman [damn those people, they sure make you work
     for it, don't they?]

credits:

"who am I" text on background page taken from http://www.oraclehumor.com/. They have some funny stuff in there